Hey people! Today was a much more beautiful day than yesterday. Instead of crying my heart out, I visited a friend I haven't seen in forever. It was nice to finally talk again, spend time together, hug each other. We thought of the good old times, the places we'd been, the people we'd once loved. It was regenerating for my heart and soul. I thought about my former best friend a lot today in the morning. I am not really waiting for her to contact me, but I know that a last conversation will be inevitable. I am looking for words that can't make her turn me into the one that ended our friendship. I am looking for words that won't hurt her, make her angry or make her cry. I am looking for words that explain what can't be explained. I wondered if I'm going to miss her. I'm sure I will. We have the same friends, the same hobbies, the same interests. It's gonna be extremely hard to work it all out. But I'm feeling really mature these days - I'm not gonna be mean to her, I'll still talk to her, work with her. After all, we've been a perfect team once. But I acknowledged that it really is over. I am tired of fighting. When I listened to Nickelback's 'Photograph' I thought of all the times I was begging on my knees for her to take me back and to forgive me. And I couldn't find a single memory of her doing the same. Which is another reason the final goodbye is coming. Enough of her. I am really in love with my male best friend these days. When my former girl best friend (who is also one of his closest friends) texted me yesterday and I started to cry, he immediately crossed the room, hugged me and comforted me. It was amazing. We went upstairs and sat onto his bed and talked and talked and talked. He distracted me and gave me chocolate. It was wonderful. He's great. Today we made plans for the weekend and I'm already looking forward. It's nice to recognize that I have a perfectly working social life seperate from my former best friend. So, today was quite a good day. I even cleaned up my room. The subtle sadness remains anyway. But time will heal, I know that. I'll be concentrating on doing my license, getting the finals for this year done, celebrate my birthday and enjoy summer. There won't be an empty hole to fill. I'll even start choir on monday. Life is great, it really is. I hope all of you out there having trouble with their best friends too are being okay. I'm here for you! Listen to the song 'astronaut' by Simple Plan, you'll feel understood. Stay tuned for news!
Letzte Einträge: Why it is better to say goodbye sometimes